Entry tags:
where is korra's head?
She was really happy over the weekend, thinking she was married to Tohru. The curse put a few month's distance between the events of the ghoul curse and that weekend.
Come Monday, everything will feel extremely surreal. She'll know that it hasn't been very long since the ghoul curse, but there will still be that sense of distance. Helpful in the day to day, but not actually very helpful for dealing with the trauma. She won't be afraid to practice her bending forms anymore, but she still won't want anything to do with weapons.
She'll also feel kind of detached from the fact that Chekov knows who Hei is. Less fear, less confusion, more acceptance. She doesn't know why Hei wiped Chekov's memories but not hers, but she isn't as invested in finding out as she was when Chekov first told her.
But she's not completely detached. It's not like she has months of memories to fill in the gap. Even as she feels like time has passed, there's also the knowledge & sensation that no time has passed at all. Her gut reaction to people, the physical/emotional sensations they evoke in her, haven't changed.
She'll feel pretty awkward around Tohru. They didn't do anything more than a little kissing and falling asleep together, but she hadn't really been attracted to the other girl before and the fact that there's residual attraction is PRETTY EMBARRASSING.
And Hei was/is/forever will be complicated. There's so many of him. There's Li the idiot, who she hasn't seen in awhile. There's the guy she's been sleeping with and dancing with and who comforted her after the ghoul curse without having to be asked. And there's the man who threatened her, hurt Chekov. Chekov regaining his memories is forcing her to reconcile with the fact that they're the same person.
Before the grab bag curse, she'd been planning to talk to Hei, to find out what he had done to Chekov and why he hadn't done it to her. The grab bag weekend curse has taken away the urgency of that. She doesn't want to see him -- she doesn't want to deal with the complications. She wants to see him -- she wants to keep the way he made her feel when he hugged her and fed her.
She's not going to go out of her way to avoid him, but she's not going to seek him out. Not while she can still pretend life has become normal. She has the new house to settle into, a new routine to get used to.
But when the ghouls come back to haunt her, he's still the only she'll talk to about it in any fashion. Lin may be a badass cop, but Korra doesn't associate her with the kind of brutal violence and death that the ghoul event brought out. She also doesn't want to lose what little good opinion Lin has of her. Korra knows Hei is no stranger to brutality (though she has no idea to what extent). He's the only person she believes won't think less of her because of what happened.
Not that she would seek him out to talk about it. But if she's feeling fragile about it and he happens to be around, she'll open up a little.
So yes. For the time being, she's focusing on settling into the new house, her job, and the trappings of normalcy. She's not going to seek out complications. (But, as always, they'll find her.) She'll be more quiet than usual, a little more inclined toward solitude, but not as bad as after the Rally. (She's gotten better at faking okay.)
Come Monday, everything will feel extremely surreal. She'll know that it hasn't been very long since the ghoul curse, but there will still be that sense of distance. Helpful in the day to day, but not actually very helpful for dealing with the trauma. She won't be afraid to practice her bending forms anymore, but she still won't want anything to do with weapons.
She'll also feel kind of detached from the fact that Chekov knows who Hei is. Less fear, less confusion, more acceptance. She doesn't know why Hei wiped Chekov's memories but not hers, but she isn't as invested in finding out as she was when Chekov first told her.
But she's not completely detached. It's not like she has months of memories to fill in the gap. Even as she feels like time has passed, there's also the knowledge & sensation that no time has passed at all. Her gut reaction to people, the physical/emotional sensations they evoke in her, haven't changed.
She'll feel pretty awkward around Tohru. They didn't do anything more than a little kissing and falling asleep together, but she hadn't really been attracted to the other girl before and the fact that there's residual attraction is PRETTY EMBARRASSING.
And Hei was/is/forever will be complicated. There's so many of him. There's Li the idiot, who she hasn't seen in awhile. There's the guy she's been sleeping with and dancing with and who comforted her after the ghoul curse without having to be asked. And there's the man who threatened her, hurt Chekov. Chekov regaining his memories is forcing her to reconcile with the fact that they're the same person.
Before the grab bag curse, she'd been planning to talk to Hei, to find out what he had done to Chekov and why he hadn't done it to her. The grab bag weekend curse has taken away the urgency of that. She doesn't want to see him -- she doesn't want to deal with the complications. She wants to see him -- she wants to keep the way he made her feel when he hugged her and fed her.
She's not going to go out of her way to avoid him, but she's not going to seek him out. Not while she can still pretend life has become normal. She has the new house to settle into, a new routine to get used to.
But when the ghouls come back to haunt her, he's still the only she'll talk to about it in any fashion. Lin may be a badass cop, but Korra doesn't associate her with the kind of brutal violence and death that the ghoul event brought out. She also doesn't want to lose what little good opinion Lin has of her. Korra knows Hei is no stranger to brutality (though she has no idea to what extent). He's the only person she believes won't think less of her because of what happened.
Not that she would seek him out to talk about it. But if she's feeling fragile about it and he happens to be around, she'll open up a little.
So yes. For the time being, she's focusing on settling into the new house, her job, and the trappings of normalcy. She's not going to seek out complications. (But, as always, they'll find her.) She'll be more quiet than usual, a little more inclined toward solitude, but not as bad as after the Rally. (She's gotten better at faking okay.)